One of my daughters school teachers said that childhood can be summed up in two words: teeth and shoes. I think that is because she is a teacher. If you are a parent it is 3 words. Poop, teeth and shoes. So this goes under the poop category:
Our septic tank exploded. We figured being built in 1957 was not agreeing with it. We did not want to have to replace it, because it would be spendy, so my intrepid husband donned his old clothes and dug up the entire back yard with a shovel. We have this conversation a lot, where I say, let’s call someone to do this for us…and he says he is just as capable as some idiot from the phone book…and I say I wasn’t saying you’re not capable … and anyway you can probably see where this is going. So he starts snaking pipes and shoveling crap, and I decide I’m not going to watch, because he is going to get mad eventually, and I don’t want to be there when he does.
He comes in later, covered in it, and says, you’re never going to guess what was wrong with the septic tank. I look at him and shoot him a “what?” look…
He says to me there was a banana peel, a pair of rolled up socks, and a RUBBER DUCK stuck down there.
At this point all the kids ran for their lives.
You heard it here first folks, poop, teeth and shoes.